Narcissists live behind a grandiose, inflated sense of self importance, with a self esteem so fragile they are unable to handle even the slightest criticism. And, if critiqued, they may react with extreme anger, belittling the other person while making it very clear who is the superior one. Behind this mask of superiority, narcissists live with continual feelings of shame and humiliation.
Narcissists have an insatiable need for attention and admiration. This never ending need has lead them down a long road of troubled and broken relationships. Their arrogant and haughty behavior is most notable around certain groups of the “less superior,” as they only associate with those of a particular class. They never tire from exaggerating their achievements and talents, or monopolizing conversations. They can easily feel slighted by others and have significant problems getting along. Considered blow hards by the majority, they are never admired to the extent they think they are.
Narcissists have one concern and that is the concern for self. A distorted sense of entitlement makes it very easy for them to take advantage of people to get what you want. They are not concerned with the feelings or well being of others. This makes the narcissist extremely dangerous to the psychological welfare of family members and those involved in an intimate relationship. They experience extreme difficulty adapting to any type of change in their surroundings. Unmanaged emotions are ever present in their private lives with intense outbursts of anger that can be unpredictable and down right frightening at times. Their skills in public deception appear well thought out one minute and inappropriate in the next.
Narcissists do not change. Narcissist can temporarily change a behavior if there is something in it for them. However, when they have gotten all they can from the situation, they will quickly retreat back to their destructive behavior. Those who become intimately involved with a narcissist will greatly suffer. The narcissist places little value on the moral character of others, but rather values only how important the intimate partner can make them appear. After capturing their intimate victims with love bombing, they will exploit them without guilt! They express little to no empathy for the plight of others, and can become enraged when they are challenged. Their intimate parters have no voice or sense of self in the relationship. The narcissist will not tolerate it. They will withhold intimacy for the power surge and intended heart break. And, without notice, they will push their partner from the pedestal, while they pursue another. These passing relationships are never missed because they were never able to connect on an emotional level. Their destructive wake leaves no regrets.
Narcissists are not thought to be born but rather made, although exactly why or how the personality traits develop is unknown. A complex combination of genetics and social factors may be to blame. It is thought that traumatic childhood events and certain unhealthy parenting styles have also played a role in the making of a narcissist. For these reasons, I am truly sorry.
I am also sorry for those whose lives have been shattered by the narcissist, and I plead with all of you not to give up hope. Thousands of people have survived the narcissist, and you can too!
“ The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong in the broken places.” ~ Ernest Hemingway. Be one of the strong and navigate away today!